It was all going so well but then we had our 20 week scan and they found that baby caitlyne only had 1.3cm of amniotic fluid and should be 4-5cm,they asked if id been leaking and i hadn't so we had to wait 9 days to see a consultant and they confirmed she onlyhad just over 1 cm by then and they called it " oliohydramnios" my membranes ruptured early.They tried an amnio infusion but too much baby,cord and placenta so was unsuccessful.They sent us home saying we may have to think of a termination but there was nothing wrong with our little girl she was growing still and organs was working she didnt have anything wrong so we just couldnt do that to her, we got transfered to kings colleage in london but they couldnt do the amnio infusion either and by then i was 23 weeks plus and i had started to leak the fluid . I also started bleeding and they said it could be the start of a miscarriage but it wasnt she was still going strong each time i went up. I found so many stories where women had this and their babies shocked them all and survived so we carried on, we was so hopefull as she was doing so well onside me and every week i smiled thinking weve got through another week. We had lots of appointments and scans every 2 weeks to check on baby caitlyne and was ok still no fluid though only small amounts so they had to explain that its her lungs as they may not form without the fluid and that they wont know untill she is born so we had to speak to peadtricians and he told us what they will do but if her lungs cant cope if they are too small they will have to withdraw care. I was going to be allowed to carry as long as i could as better for her to be in me for as long as possible & i was having a booked csection as that is what i have had with my other 2 but i got to 29 weeks + 1 day and i started to get crampings and waited for my husband to come home from work at 10 o clock that night and told him so he made me call them they asked me to go in. I was praying she wasnt trying to come now just a little longer please they put me in my own room on delivery and put me on ecg she was fine heart beat fine and no contractions came up on monitor but they wanted to keep me in as i was still having pains now and then and bleeding and a show as well. So my husband went home with my step mum and i think i went to bed at 0515am i woke up at 0645am still having the pains every now and then but still nothing coming up on ecg, my husband came up in morning with my mum and we waited for a scan had that at 1.30pm wednesday 28th and from the scan she was still transverse and not showing signs of coming out although my placenta was looking old but she did the checks and still working so she had said i could prob go home so i was excited with the thort that she was staying inside me and i could go home to my other 2. But when we got back upstairs to my room the doctor said no i had to stay in as still having the pains in my tummy and they transfered me upstairs to another ward i was in tears as i just wanted to get home. I stopped crying and my hisband went to get me some bits and then came back up in the evening with my brother and my oldest son who is 8 so that cheered me up they left at around 9 o clock and i called him to say id only had aound 6 pains alnight so i was going to sleep this was at 1130pm which i did straight away as so tired,i woke at 0230am thursday morning with back pains and layed there till 0330am but then i couldnt sit down they gave me some tablets and said to tell them if it got worse and asked was it contractions and i said i dont know thats why i am telling you i havent done this naturally before. They was so busy alnight i spent most of it outside walking and pacing in my room i had a bath at -530ish thinking that may help but it didnt and then the other 2 ladies was awake by then so they was talking to me and seeing i was in pain i couldnt really talk. Then the midwife came in to see me before she finished first time alnight and asked did i want some codein so i said yes please they are quite bad now so she brought me some of that and went. I called my husband to say he needed to get sorted and come up because i think im in labour and he said what have they said so i burst into tears and said nothing they keep asking me and i dont know but it feels like i am so he started to get ready at home. I started paceing the corridors and i was swaeting the care assistants just kept walking aost me they see it everyday i guess a women in labour but eventually after 30-40 minutes one stopped to ask if i was ok and i cried and said no im really in pain now i need someone so she got the new midwife and she came straight out to me and asked me if it was contractions so i was crying saying i dont know im not sure but they are hurting me now so she tried to put me on ecg but i just couldnt sit down so it kept falling off my husband rang the phone at my bed around 8 o clock and she said she cant talk right now shes in alot of pain im trying to help her now she'll call you back and by then i was crossing my legs so she made me get on bed to be examined and confirmed there was her head there so she panicked as i was only 29 weeks and they got me down stairs this was at 0810 buy 0826 she was here and she was breathing,moving,crying she looked like my other 2 babies i was so pleased the peadtricians all came running in and got to work they had to put a tube in to help her breathe as it was alot for her but she was doing it her colour was pink she was doing ok they took her to baby unit at 0926am and my husband and mum just missed her as they turnt up seconds later he knew id had her because the midwife on delivery called him straight away we was so happy and in shock i couldnt believe it i had her and she was breathing so i said she must have lungs she must have. Then i got sorted and we was desparate to get up to her but they said they was really busy as had other prem babies born so it was too busy up there but caitlyne was doing ok so we sat around waiting we eventually got to go up at 2.40pm we walked into the hot room and could see from the peadtrician she was doing so well and they explained her lungs are very small and the machine is just drowning her lungs they was going to put her on a smaller ventilator and we had to pray that would help her stabilize so we had to leave another hour or so went by and we got back up to her and we could see it didnt work she was back on the bigger machine all her things was bleeping and we could see her oxygen went down to 40 and her co2 was 225 plus and they said her lungs are too small and she just isnt going to make it so we had to make a choice and we knew she would be brain damaged too and her little body working so hard so we had to say goodbye to her i just couldnt believe it she was meant to be ok we was going to be ok it was never meant to end this way i just cant believe she has gone she was so very perfect in every way she was beautiful . They brought her into a room to us and we got to spend her last hour with her just us and cuddled and kissed her and talked to her she fell asleep at 5.30pm and i have never felt a pain like it. we cannot believe it we got so far she did so well she was such a little fighter. I came home we left there about 2130 and i left without my baby in my arms no mum should have to do that life just isnt fair . Now its been over a week and i have seen a few times i just want to pick her up and bring her home where she belongs , her funeral is on the 25th and im just numb all i feel is pain and more i want my baby back we all do, she would of had a lovely big brother who is 8 and a brilliant big sister who is 3 it has been so hard for them to understand . We just miss her and wish she was here .